The Fear Food Chronicles #1



I remember the last time I ate bread was in the summer of 2010 as a mentor at the Upward Bound Program. We had just taken our students white water rafting for a team builder. We were soaked and stopped in the middle of the trip for our lunch break.

The only vegetarian-friendly option (not even vegan) was hotdog rolls and mustard. (Really though, why would you have pork rinds as a side option. Oh, Delaware) So that’s what I ate for lunch that day.

I felt so guilty about it that I hadn’t eaten it since.

Until August 18th, 2016.

Yesterday, I ate one piece of toasted Ezekiel 4:9 Bread with my lunch. It wasn’t good. But it wasn’t bad. I didn’t flip out nearly as much as I had expected myself to, but I can’t say that I totally feel comfortable with the experience. ALTHOUGH- I did dip the bread in some pretty great hummus.

Until next time, Mr. Carb.

I believe in Breakfast

The FDA wasn’t kidding. Breakfast really is the most important meal.

In middle school, there was something terribly annoying about eating breakfast. It was too early, the school bus would be here in five minutes, and my groggy, thirteen year-old self was too consumed with conditioning my hair rather than nourishing my stomach. Often, breakfast became my mother shoving one of those crummy granola bars and a Yoo-Hoo juice box into my hands as I ran out the door hoping to catch up with the bus that was already halfway down the street.

Having matured a bit (not fully- I will continue sip those Yoo-Hoos until the day I die,) I have come to one, and only one, concrete life conclusion- I believe in breakfast. Sure there’s the whole yadayada about the nutritional importance of jump starting your metabolism in the morning, but the entire process of this morning meal has a much deeper impact. It’s so simple. If you eat a crappy breakfast, you’ll probably end up having a crappy day. Did you burn your hand the pan making an omelet this morning? That scathed hand is going to be throbbing through lunch and dinner, too. Spilled milk when making your bowl of Cheerios? Welp, well there’s another perfectly planned outfit gone to waste. But regardless of what you eat, the act of sitting down, taking a moment to think about the day ahead is refreshing and therapeutic. You can ready yourself of the day’s tasks, contemplate the events of yesterday, and set goals for tomorrow. For those with savory tastes, breakfast offers bacon, toast, sausage, and oatmeal. Have more of a sweet tooth? Check out the pancakes, french toast, and multitudes of differently flavored syrup. Innately, it has options for the carnivore, vegetarian, and vegan in all of us.There is a reason that most IHOPS are open 24-hours. Hell, it’s a International House of Pancakes. If this isn’t proof of a global phenomenon, I don’t know what is. If you can’t get your fill of breakfast in the morning or even if you’re one of those people who hates to wake up early, the versatility of breakfast is, frankly, indisputable. Want breakfast for lunch? Brunch. Breakfast for dinner? Brinner. My favorite meal was always when my mother decided to make pancakes for dinner. Think about it. There is a reason no one considers having “Dunch” or “Linner.” Who wants to combine lunch and dinner? Everyone wants breakfast in bed, but lunch in bed? I refuse to even contemplate the notion.

There’s a sense of security that lies in the morning meal. The first pancake never cooks right, Cap’n Crunch cereal cuts the roof of your mouth, and the outside of the syrup container will always be sticky. Within the realm of breakfast lies universal truths upon which everyone can agree. I’m not saying that breakfast is the answer to achieving world peace, but if everyone took the time to give breakfast the time and care it deserves, the world would be a much happier place. Regardless of what side of the bed I end up getting on, I know that I’ll always have a warm bowl of oatmeal to look forward to.